Most Common Responses That Infuriate Her When Your Girlfriend Wants to Vent

You’ve been listening to Your Japanese girlfriend vent about her work or school, but suddenly, you realize that her frustration is now directed at you. How did this happen? Today, based on survey responses we collected, we share with you the types of comments that you shouldn’t make when she’s already irritated about something.

1. “I don’t think you’re right about that.”

“Who asked him to be the judge?!” You’re already walking a fine line if you interrupt her while she’s in the middle of venting. Even if you think she’s being unreasonable, let her finish what she has to say before you open your mouth (that is, if you dare).

2. “In that kind of situation, you should …”

“Excuse me, did I ask for your advice?!” When she’s already irritated about something, it’s best to keep your advice to yourself, or you’ll add fuel to the fire. In many cases, all she wants to do is vent, and she’s not expecting any advice in return. Just listen to her.

3. “So, what’s your point?”

“This isn’t CliffsNotes! There’s no synopsis.” Your attempt to get to the gist of her complaints has failed miserably. She is now mad at you. As painful as it may be, you will be released from having to listen to her vent much quicker if you don’t interrupt. It’s her way of relieving stress.

4. “Yeah, me too. What happened to me was …”

“I’m still in the middle of my story! It’s not your turn.” If you try to take control of the conversation when it’s not quite your turn, be prepared to face an angry girlfriend. If you have something to add to her story, wait until she’s definitely done telling it, and then share your story.

5. “Uh-huh.” (While you play with your cell phone.)

“Even between boyfriend and girlfriend, that’s just rude!” If your mind wanders and you don’t pay attention to what she has to say, she won’t be happy about your attitude. If you’re expecting an important work email, let her know in advance and excuse yourself briefly to check the message.

6. “Huh? What did you just say?”

“I don’t want to repeat myself!” Busted. You were daydreaming when you were supposed to be listening to her. If it’s a serious matter that she needs your advice and opinion on, you’ll need to understand the full story, so ask questions if you miss something. Otherwise, it may be better to let it slide if you missed a point or two here and there.

7. “When will you be done?”

“It makes me sad that he can’t even let me vent till the end.” If you make it obvious that you’re uninterested in the things she has to say, it will further aggravate her. Even if it’s a fruitless effort, be patient and attentive. That way, she’ll appreciate you putting up with her moaning, and snap out of her misery much quicker.

8. “That’s tit for tat.”

“Okay, Mr. Righteous. I won’t be asking you anymore.” When she’s venting to you, she doesn’t need you to analyze where the responsibility lies. If you point that out, you’ll only exacerbate matters. Until she calms down, you should show your 100% support as her boyfriend.

9. “It’s not good to badmouth others.”

“I’m telling him these things because I trust him. If I can’t tell him, who else can I tell?” If you lecture her complaining about others, you’ll be in deeper trouble with her. Of course, she knows it isn’t great to complain or to badmouth others. You need to show a little more understanding as a caring boyfriend and allow her to vent once in a while.