Boyfriends Who Are Totally Unreliable When Girlfriends Need Them

Loose lips sink ships. You may not think anything of it, but be careful what you say, as you may sound indecisive or unreliable, and this can change her impression of you as a good boyfriend. Today, we conducted a survey and asked Japanese girls to share their thoughts on things past boyfriends said that made them realize their boyfriends would be dependable when push came to shove.

1. “It doesn’t matter who said what.” You try to evade taking responsibility.

“I knew then I couldn’t rely on him. He couldn’t even live up to his own responsibilities.” If you don’t keep your promises or you avoid taking responsibility, she will write you off as untrustworthy. Interestingly enough, if you use the same statement when she’s at fault, it’ll have a totally different effect. You’ll sound like the most generous individual.

2. “My mom said…”

“Are you serious?! Stop being a mama’s boy and grow up!” Possibly the worst thing you can do is mention what your mom said as a basis for your beliefs. Equally, if you rationalize your behavior with what your boss or dad said, you’ll also sound childish.

3. “Let’s discuss this another day.” You avoid serious conversations.

“We’ve been dating for quite some time and I want him to know that it’s not all fun and games.” If you keep avoiding serious talks with her, she’ll eventually give up on you, believing that you’re not interested in building a future with her. If you’re a natural jester and tend to joke about everything, it’s time to learn how to converse like an adult.

4. “Do what you like.” You leave everything up to her.

“It may sound good, but I think he’s just being lazy.” You think you’re being an understanding boyfriend, but she can see through you. If you happen to share responsibilities, make sure she knows you’re willing to work on areas of your relationship. Ask her to “divide and conquer,” so that she’ll know you’re an equal participant in the relationship.

5. “I’m tired too.” You don’t take her issue seriously.

“I’m worried that he’s going to say the same thing when I really need his help.” If you don’t make time to listen and support her, soon she’ll assume that you’ll be unreliable in a crunch. If you have a legitimate reason for not making time for her, suggest alternatives. “I’m not feeling well today, but how about we talk things over tomorrow at lunch?” She’ll appreciate your willingness to suggest an alternative.

6. “When push comes to shove, you know you can rely on me.”

“I heard that so many times and I’m sick of it.” You’re overconfident, but you stop short when you’re actually put to the test. She’s starting to doubt whether you’re going to be there for her when she needs you. Don’t forget, actions speak louder than words. To be a real man, you need to show deeds, not words.

7. “That’s too much hassle.”

“I’m concerned that he’ll have the same attitude for everything in the future.” This is one of the least popular comments men make. To women, it sounds like you’ve given up on thinking about things altogether. “I don’t care” or “I can’t be bothered” also make a bad impression on women, so use these expressions sparingly.

8. “I’ll think about it.”

“I can’t stand an indecisive man!” Regardless of how significant the issue may be, if you take forever to reach a decision, your girlfriend will eventually lose patience. If you need more time to think about it, let her know that you’re working on other issues and that you’ll need a couple more days. That way, you’ll appear studious rather than indecisive.

9. “I don’t think it concerns me.”

“I’m so disappointed in him. After all, he cares only about himself.” If you’re reluctant to lend a hand to others, you’ll appear like Scrooge in A Christmas Carol. Especially if she asks for your help on a personal matter, this kind of statement will upset her deeply. Delete this phrase from your vocabulary forever.